Sea Monsters Of Old And Marshmallows
I awoke and found myself at the ocean. I had no memory of how I got there. The sky was cinematic gray. As I began to walk along the beach I was alone. Then the whole world began to shake like I was in a Jason Bourne movie. I felt ill. So I ran. Eventually I fell down on the sand. The shaking stopped. I looked out at the crashing waves and suddenly Leviathan, The Kraken, The Giant Squid, and several other sea monsters of old appeared near the shore. One by one they all made incredibly loud sea monster noises. I figured it was probably not a good idea to go in the water.
Then I noticed that laying right next to me was one of those t-shirt launching guns they use at minor league baseball games. And next to that was a huge pile of marshmallows that were the exact same size as rolled up t-shirts. So naturally I began launching marshmallows out to the awaiting sea monsters, who were surprisingly good at catching marshmallows. After I launched the last marshmallow the sea monsters slid back into the waters and were gone. I felt alone again.
Then I felt a tapping on my shoulder. And a muffled sound like an irritated man talking. Then a man in a tie appeared. He was talking. I struggled to understand him. Then suddenly I could. He was saying “Sir. You need to stop throwing toilet paper rolls down the aisle. You're scaring the other customers.” I said “Sorry. I'm easily distracted. I actually came for milk.”